Empathy, Merging and Compassion

by Lezli Censullo

I remember, as I was growing up, being taught that it was better to offer empathy than sympathy.  Empathy had more the flavor of putting oneself in another’s shoes whereas sympathy was more about just feeling badly for another’s misfortune. It occurs to me, as I write this, that my very early understanding was that in one case, one identified with another (a form of merging) and that in the other case, one kept oneself separate from the identity of the one suffering. So, sympathy comes from the head perhaps, without necessarily involving the heart. Where then does empathy come from, I wonder? And the answer that rises up is that  empathy comes from the feet!  (Pisces rules the feet.). And what joins them together is compassion, which comes from the heart. And when we allow our heart to be the place where heaven and earth come together, we join both worlds and serve as a channel for those energies to come through us.  Wow.  And so, that is one of the opportunities Pisces energy offers us:  the ability to stand in more than one world and channel love in all its forms.  What are you praying about?  Or wishing for? Or wanting dearly?  Are your prayers/wishes/desires a form of love?

 And that leads to me to two more thoughts: 

My mother, who taught me a lot about compassion, was a Pisces.  She likely was also an empath.  Her boundaries were porous.  Love was her secret sauce.  And that love was both blessing and curse. 

Compassion may be my secret sauce.  And it, too, is a double-edged sword. Doing everything with passion can be both invigorating and exhausting. 

And that brings me back to the idea of merging, which was the keyword I was originally meant to be writing about.  And honestly, as I tried to do it, I felt a huge resistance.  I decided to stay with it and explore the resistance.  And the answer came to me in the form of a symbol – my beloved vesica piscis, which so beautifully illustrates the concept of both/and.  When we embrace both/and, a beautiful opportunity opens up for us to create something new that synthesizes the best of both, whatever the things are. J   And in so many ways, I see this as the essence of Pisces.  The ability to love, honor, and see both/and.  To both empathize and hold one’s feelings in a separate way.  To have boundaries that can both open and close.  To merge and remain separate.  To live in multiple realities and time zones.  To be of this earth AND made of stardust. 

Does this feel a bit foggy to you?  A bit here and there and nowhere?  Without conclusions to hang on to?  Welcome to Pisces season! I could go on and on, but will stop here, because I dearly want to know what is in your hearts and minds as you read this.  May your feet carry you far; may your hearts take you wide. 

And, oh, one more thing.  Vulnerability.  When we allow ourselves to be porous, to open to all that is, to love unconditionally, to question, to write a blog without any answers or felt wisdom, we can feel vulnerable.  Did reading this bring on vulnerability?  Writing it sure did. But vulnerability is the gift of our Selves opening to our Selves.  Looking at our fears and perhaps releasing them.  And allowing the soft pink tender parts of ourselves to emerge.  There’s that word again.  I think I found a way through the resistance.

Thank you for listening.